The guy I’ve had a crush on for three years asked me out yesterday, and now is really distant. He’s ignoring my texts for hours, and he practically ran from the room when I was over to visit his sister. I’m crazy for him, and I hope he’s into me too. I’m 15 and he’s 16.
This was one of the most helpful articles I have ever read about this topic! I have searched and searched for answers to the way my man has been acting and this is most definitely our situation. It helps me understand him on a whole new level and appreciate his feelings more deeply. Thank you so much!
I am seeing a guy right now, we have sex from time to time and I spend the night afterward because he wants me to. Spending the night confuses me because when I am not around him, he doesn’t text back. But randomly he would call me or text me on his time…I don’t expect to talk to him all day but he literally will ignore me until he wants to talk to me again. I don’t know if he sees a future with me or just using me.
Conrad Williams SAYS:
I have been reviewing other sites on the psychology behind relationships and learning a lot from from women want in a man and why they pull away. `However looking at this article from Kate Rose offers a view from a women’s side understanding why men perhaps stand aloof at the beginning of a relationship and why mine with a new woman more recently broke up. I was trying to work this out and perhaps looking at another viewpoint, a woman’s understanding of men in a relationship, teaches you more about yourself, ie; myself.
Plenty of sites say things like, “A guy who is shy might not make a direct move, but if he’s really interested in a woman, he will make some moves.” This is a complete – and false – generalization. There are many men, who like myself, are intensely shy. Although we know our feelings and desires are normal and legitimate from a ‘textbook’ perspective, we have a strong sense that expressing them to any woman would be offensive because we simply don’t have what it takes to attract a woman on those levels. So we literally never do or say anything to express our sexual / romantic feelings for a woman. None of this has to do with bodily / physical condition, employment, dwelling status, wealth, lifestyle or other ‘checklist’ item for men who want to attract women.
I am 43 and have many great [platonic] women friends who seek out / enjoy my company. When the subject of relationships arises, they ask me why I have never approached or asked any woman out. Many self-described ‘dating experts’, as well as others, say that women often give ‘clear signals’ to men they like and want to approach them – I have never gotten any such signal from a woman that has been clear enough for me to take it as an invitation approach, so I haven’t. One or more of my women friends has sometimes been with me when [they say] I get a signal – but I do not see it, https://besthookupwebsites.org/sugar-daddies-usa/sc/charleston/ so to me it is not there.
I’m in the exact position right now. I’ve been friends with is guy for almost 7 years. Although I’ve always believed this guy was my soulmate. The only problem was he’s in the US and I’m in Australia. A lot has happened in those 7 years. We stayed as friends until I found someone here in Australia who became my husband and the father of my daughter, but after 4 years of being with him, we decided to split. Everything felt rushed. In those 4 years I didn’t talk to my American friend. Up until after my split with my ex husband. Since after reconnecting with my American friend a lot has been confessed but at the same time he’s not as open as he used to be. It’s like starting from the very beginning again. He confessed some major stuff that he says he can only say when he’s drunk, but when he’s not he’s very reserved. The thing is this guy makes an effort to call no matter how busy and shitty his week has been. Never failed to support me with anything. At the end of the day I feel like I might just have to wait on focusing on myself first since I’ve no interest in dating a guy – unless it was him since I’ve known him for that long, but I wanna make sure I’m really ready. In a way, I think I’m ready if it was him. I feel connected to him. It’s one of those weird things, but I’m a little confused with how he feels about me.
He could very well be withdrawing, as you say in your article, because of his feelings, which I hope is what’s happening here. That’s actually what my mutual friend said last weekend that “maybe he’s actually starting to care about somebody other than himself”. (Love that quote lol). And I’m being positive. After all, he came back to me after he screwed up and apologized to me, this was all a week and a half ago, so it’s all very confusing. What do you think I should do? I wanted to invite him to this party that I’m going to next weekend but at the same time I want him to reach out to me first since I already called him.